Contraindicated

My husband is one of those people who naturally assumes control of everything in the situation around him. He gets it from his mother. It's a nurturing quality that stems from his desire to take care of everything, especially his loved ones, but that is inevitably embellished with his natural tendency towards compulsiveness. The compulsive side of this instinct of his sometimes drives me nuts. It also drives me nuts that his desire take care verges on the absurd: "When you go to the bank, don't forget your bank card." "I will pack the car for you, but I will put the things you need to remove immediately on the seats, and the rest in the trunk I will remove when I get home, so don't worry about it." Stuff like that. It leads me to answer with haughty comments, such as "You know, I survived before you, and I would survive without you!"

However. My track record would lead one to believe otherwise.

A few months ago, hubby traveled off to Spain with Munchkin to visit the fam. And this is what happens on the FIRST day I'm alone.

I was fairly proud of myself for spending a tremendous evening after they left cleaning and being all grown up. I walked out the front door with my purse, keys, and iPhone. I got in the car, laid all that stuff on the front seat and started the car. Then I remembered that I forgot my pager inside. Cursing myself for being such a shlemazl, I turned off the car, took the keys and went back in the house. The car is new. It has one of those things where when you walk away with the keys, it locks. So, it locked. I got back in the house, I grabbed my pager, check myself out in the mirror, and walked out again, shutting the door behind me.

The very instant I did that, I realized that I left the keys in the house.

So, now I was standing outside my house without keys, and therefore, unable to get back into the house.

Fortunately, the car garage opens with a code.

Unfortunately, I don't know the code.

Fortunately, I have it stored in my iPhone.

Unfortunately, as you may have surmised, the iPhone is in the car. Which is locked. And I'm alone for the next week. And no one has an extra key; the extra key is with hubby and baby in Spain. The circle closes.

Sigh.

So what did I do? Other than attempt to use a friendly neighbor's phone to reach hubby in Spain (no answer, but much humiliation), I had no choice than to walk to work and wait for him to call me back. Good thing it was nice out and the hospital is close.

I left him a pretty stern message with strict instructions not to laugh. When he called back, the note of the very laughter I forbade and mild derision in his voice drove me crazy...

Being on my own is bad bad bad for my health and is contraindicated.

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