Pontificum Scriblerus

Bear with me for these explanations, please: JCAHO is an [evil corporation] organization whose job it is [to make life very difficult] ensure quality and compliance in hospitals by [imposing useless arbitrary rules] setting certain standards. One of the standards is the "TIME OUT." The "TIME OUT" is when before you start a procedure, you repeat outloud the patient's name, date of birth, procedure, site and side, and operator. It's to prevent wrong legs from being cut off. Ok, so, in the bathroom on the 4th floor of the hospital, there are signs. You can read them as you squat on the toilet. Or even if you're standing and facing the other way too. "DURING THE TIME OUT:" the whole team has to participate! "DURING THE TIME OUT:" all activity must stop during a time out! "DURING THE TIME OUT:" a detailed procedure note needs to be documented! I would like to think that this was posted there by someone with a good sense of humor,...

By "place" I'm not sure if I mean this hospital or this country , because currently, I'm angry at both. I was making rounds, and I saw this resident, who is pregnant and due next week. We made smalltalk, oh, when are you due, how do you feel... What rotation are you on? So, she's been in the ICU, while 9 months pregnant, and today, when she is no longer in the ICU, she got pulled to cover 3 days for another resident while he is away. Who the hell did she piss off?? And who the hell puts a woman who's 9 months pregnant and due next week to cover somebody else when she might drop it at any time?! Apparently, though, pregnancy is not an illness, it's a condition, she was told. I guess they're waiting until it becomes an illness when they're pushing this girl to the brink. This is "equal rights" to a ridiculous degree. Very encouraging for young women. This and the freaking 4 weeks of unpaid leave we get (when we're owed 12)!!

Like the stalker/spy shops of yore, apparently, there are anonymous proxies who will hide your IP address and make you untrackable as you surf the web. So, I've been getting visits from Chicago, Illinois and Ljubljana, Slovenia, and various other places, which turn out to be sites like "Hidemyipaddress.org." I think it's creepy. The blog is out there, and I don't mind if strangers read it, but it does freak me out that they're taking such good care that I don't know where they're looking at me from. Please don't block your IP address if you read about my life... I find it uncomfortable, and I'll privatize this thing if I keep getting them...

Introduction We had a run of the mill day yesterday. Case Description One sort of exciting thing that happened was an urgent consult called in by the cardiac care unit: a young man, only 38, had been admitted with what looked like a STEMI (bona fide heart attack). There was a tear in his coronary artery which had clotted off the entire vessel. The cardiologists found it unsafe to stent this area, and opted to treat medically, with 4 different blood thinners. The patient came to the ICU, and immediately started to have what we call "massive hematemesis." He was basically exsanguinating from somewhere within his GI tract and vomiting the blood up. What the source of the bleeding is was not clear. I showed up there, and saw about 15 people around this room: the ICU attending, the ICU fellow, the ICU resident, the ER intern rotating in the ICU, the medical student, the interventional cardiologist, the interventional cardiology fellow, the surgical chief and his mid level resident...

It's no surprise, and it's no news, that reproduction is in the air. In the last 3 years, I know no less that 20 couples who have had babies, and at any one moment, no less than 3 people I know are pregnant at the same time. This sort of thing is rather contagious, but restricted by factors outside my control, I've not been able to join the ranks. This doesn't prevent me, however, from fantasizing about my future offspring with my beloved husband. We're both wonderful, smart, and most of all, really really really really good-luking people. So, ergo, our children are going to be beautiful little creatures that will lift morale all over the world. Baby on a good day: Baby on a bad day: Population control...

Last week was the coincidental overlap of Passover and Easter. I was on call, and absolutely miserable secondary to getting called in 3/4 nights to deal with people swallowing things (Liquid Plumr, thumbtacks, metal clips), so completely neglected to plan or even attend someone else's Sedar. I mean, my Sedars are usually symbolic anyway, but at least I direct a nod towards god and the rest of the tribe. Not last week though. Last week, I mostly celebrated freeing metallic objects out of people's insides, not freeing, you know... the Jews... On the other hand, Sunday was Easter, and we went to mom's for dinner. She made the most delicious lamb. Then I found out that lamb is the traditional food for Easter, apparently. Oops. On the third hand, the lamb was served with tsimis, which is a Jewish passover dish of carrots stewed with dry fruits (100% leavening free). We also snacked on Matza - but on Easter Sunday. I'm so confused. Basically, as always, I am caught in an iden...