No thinking while driving

I'm starting to fear my commute.

Forget the two car accidents, that is not why I fear it. It's because I do some of my worst thinking in the car while I'm driving. It's a half hour to forty five minutes of me versus my brain, and the brain usually wins.

Yesterday, I had this fleeting thought: I can't wait to switch to my next rotation. And along with this thought, I imagined my old hospital, and a whole other service. A general medicine service.

Then, something spoke up and reminded me that I'm doing GI, and there will be no switching. So, I tried to picture myself as a practicing gastroenterologist, and I realized that I have no picture of it in my head. At all. Will I be seeing patients in clinic? Will I be scoping 2 days a week at a surgi-center? It all felt completely alien. Even as a resident, when I was DYING to get into GI, I had an idea of what I would do when I fisnished: I thought I'd do liver, and deal with cirrhotic sickies. But that desire has faded, and no new one has arisen. I have no notion of my professional future.

And I think I realized that I'm sick of GI.

Thinking and driving is bad for me.

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