Skit-so
In the wake of a discussion with a superior on how I can do better, and amidst the expectatory fever of the days before my "TALK" with the division chief on Wednesday, my mind has clearly come undone and is acting out.
Last night, I dreamt that I had a liver tranpsplant. Directly into my right side. There was a bruise, but it was going away. In my dream, I run my fingers over the numb skin of the scar, and muse about the miracles of medicne. The scar is vertical instead of oblique, the way it would be in real life.
All this month I was telling my patients: You cannot drink any more. Not even a sip. Not even from someone else's drink. Not even a non alcoholic beer.
In my dream, I drink a glass of wine with dinner. First, it's red wine. Then it's a glass of champagne.
Then, awash with fear and anxiety, I obssess about it. In cold sweat, tell myself, it's just a little, it won't be bad. (but what if it is) If no one knows, it didn't happen. (but what if I get sick) Just wait and see and don't freak out. (but what if...)
As far as nightmares go, I suppose this one is rather tame when put on paper, but it was chilling to the bone to feel that kind of anxiety - in my sleep.
Last night, I dreamt that I had a liver tranpsplant. Directly into my right side. There was a bruise, but it was going away. In my dream, I run my fingers over the numb skin of the scar, and muse about the miracles of medicne. The scar is vertical instead of oblique, the way it would be in real life.
All this month I was telling my patients: You cannot drink any more. Not even a sip. Not even from someone else's drink. Not even a non alcoholic beer.
In my dream, I drink a glass of wine with dinner. First, it's red wine. Then it's a glass of champagne.
Then, awash with fear and anxiety, I obssess about it. In cold sweat, tell myself, it's just a little, it won't be bad. (but what if it is) If no one knows, it didn't happen. (but what if I get sick) Just wait and see and don't freak out. (but what if...)
As far as nightmares go, I suppose this one is rather tame when put on paper, but it was chilling to the bone to feel that kind of anxiety - in my sleep.
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