Don't tell me stories

The first thing they told us in medical school was the following: believe it or not, they said, cold weather does not cause colds.

Hold on, hold on, HOLD ON. WHAT?!

Last night we had a fun dinner and un-fun walk in the cold to a bar for drinks. My hate for control tops left certain body parts vulnerable the wind. The result? The fat in my ass solidified into shortening, and I had icicle toes. And today, voila! Sniffles.

Don't tell me cold weather doesn't cause colds!

Next thing they're gonna say is that it's ok to swim on a full stomach! Or eat things off the floor!

One thing I know is true; if you keep making faces, eventually, it'll freeze that way:



Uh oh!!



Help me!



PHEW! Much better!

Happy birthday, shnookums.

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